Out of Steam

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Well, I’m just about out of gas here.

I’ve tried to be a faithful blogger, and what I wanted more than anything for this space was to offer a place for people to come and laugh for at my antics, wit, and clever li’l stories.

You know what?  Before I realized it I was farther from that than I could imagine.  This dump couldn’t be any farther from what I imagined it to be.  I couldn’t be funny on command if I tried.  Not on my life, not at gunpoint.  I’m not funny, and I hate to admit that but dang – it’s true.

I could sit here and push and strain and grunt like a constipated truck driver with a swollen prostate and try to squeeze some humor out of my every day life, but I don’t see that much humor in it.  What’s funny about an overweight, heart-attack bound depressive personality with no job and archaic ideas?

I could try and put a funny spin on my writer’s journey, but that’s about as funny as a stroke.  I haven’t done anything to regale you with.  I haven’t submitted a story or manuscript to anyone, I haven’t looked up anyone or anywhere to submit to, and I haven’t even finished a novel yet.  I read an “interview” over on deviantART today from a 19 year-old writer who’s written seven novels. SEVEN.  Frickin’ seven.  And she’s just a freshman in college.  Here I sit, rotting, wondering what my feet look like these days, scratching at weird itches and growing hair in weird places, wondering what I’m gonna do if I don’t get a damned job soon, and she’s finished seven frickin’ novels. What’s funny about my writer’s journey?  The fact that I keep telling you there IS a writer’s journey when they’re ain’t.

Nothing’s funny.  What do I have to make someone laugh with?  So this place, which I wanted to be clever and witty and full of funny little stories about my life, cute little vignettes to make everyone smile … isn’t.  Is. Not. Funny.  And I’ve started getting comments indicating I’m not only not funny, I’m downright boring.

So, with that in mind, I have to make a change.  I guess I have to find something to focus my blogging, because my life is too doggone dull to try and blog every day about.  It just … it’s boring.

So what’d you do over the weekend?



14 thoughts on “Out of Steam

  1. Seven published novels? I’d only be impressed if one at least was or was being considered. Writing a lot doesn’t mean a person is any good. And we shouldn’t compare our accomplishments to people whose life circumstances are so different from our own.

    Annie, you’d best be careful or I’m going to start counting on you to slap me on the back of the head whenever I forget that writing doth not a good writer make. Thanks. None of her novels have been published, though she does have a couple of short works with eZines and such.

  2. Knyt

    Listen pal everyone gets in a rut we all go through periods where we think …hell this stinks..for me it was cancer. dont try to be funny just be you..write and talk about your life everyones life journey is funny MAYBE NOT TO THEM…but cmon buddy keep truckin..youll see things will get better…so what some little punk has written 7 novels about him and his boyfriend and their sexual escapades in his mothers basement where he lives …..keep bloggin the blogosphere needs an overweight chronically chainsmoking fancy pants like you (thats a joke by the way) Zman sends

    Oh, Zman, you brought a stitch to my side with that one, bud! Thanks for keeping me goin’, it means more than I can tell you. Especially knowing where you’re coming from. Thanks for being an inspiration. 🙂

  3. Don’t know why you feel you have to be funny…and as i wrote that i realize i feel the same way…maybe i should take my own advice.

    Ditto what Anniegirl said.

    sorry for the terrible one-hand typing.

    Annie had some sound words there. A real wake-up for me. Zman made me realize somethings too. And here you are suffering the same way. I don’t know why I felt I needed to make people smile but … it’s not the worst goal to have either, I guess. 🙂

    I’m sorry about your hand being hurt, hon. OHT for that reason is no fun at all. 😦

  4. This past weekend I made plans for next weekend. I will be meeting a fellow over dinner and drinks.

    Hmm … I see ….

  5. ^ fellow what? Fellow blogger.

    I know, I know, gotta poofread my comments.

    Whew! I thought you’d gone over to the other team for a minute there. Thanks for clarifying.

  6. Hang in there my friend!

    And please don’t ever compare your career against anyone else’s. I did that for far too long and I worried about when my big break was going to happen. In the end all I did was rob myself of the joy of writing.

    And that’s why we’re doing this right? Because we love to write- right?

    My old man is a musician, he always wanted to make it to the big time- records and all that but it never worked out that way. But he loves what he does and he may not have a lot of bling but I think he’s as content as any 50 year old man with a 20 year old wife could be.

    How bad off can a 50 year-old guy be with a 20 year-old wife? I asks ya.

    So what am I saying here? Aside from the fact my stepmom is kinda hot?


    I’m saying you just can’t keep score- you can’t assume that you’ll be able to do as much as the next writer. Just be you and take joy in your words and if you are lucky enough to entertain a handful of people doing so even better.

    I learned recently that for every novel published 10,000 or so are rejected – short fiction’s numbers can be even worse. Those odds used to bother me but nowadays I just say to myself “F*ck it. I’m writing a story about the tech support line for the Necromonicon anyway!”

    Hope that helped.

    It did. Thank you Al. Very much. Is your stepmom’s webcam on? (j/k … don’t taze me, bro.)

    And what did I do for my weekend? I watched 20 hours of DOCTOR WHO.

    YIKES! My brain turned to mush just reading that. 😉 (J/K)

  7. I don’t know. I thought that post was pretty funny. 🙂 Don’t be discouraged. Everyone gets in blogging/writing ruts, except maybe that little twit with the 7 books. I’m definitely in a blogging rut. My posts are no were near as funny as they were when I started it. I think I need to branch out a little and create a broader-based blog. You just have to keep plugging away when inspiration strikes. Maybe you can combine your love of writing with something else you enjoy, then you’ll have more things to find humor in.

    Thanks, Courtney. Sometimes I have so little to say, because my world’s so tiny, and when I stop to consider how much I can “teach” about writing, it doesn’t amount to much. At least you’ve offered that — and we who’ve read it are appreciative. But I’ll fully take your advice to strike with the iron of inspiration is hot and go with those whims of the muse as far as I can. Thank you for the encouragement. I needed it.

  8. The stepmom thing reminded me of Bill & Ted’s Excellent adventure.

    “Dude, remember when I asked your mom to the prom?”

    Darcknyt – I think you totally need to get off the deviantart. It’s a horrible addiction, and it only brings pain. If you keep this up, I’ll have to come out there and stage an intervention.

    My name is DarcKnyt, and I … I … I use … deviantART.

  9. Knyt

    So as you can see by your comments you dont need to be funny you just need to be you…you have some people on your blog roll..interesting blogs…now get back to blogging Nancy boy….zman sends

    Yes sir! *Salute* 😀

  10. I find some of your blogs interesting and funny but I usually just laugh at everything. I think that came out wrong, you might say I’m crazy LOL. Well I am, half. I try not to let things bother me.

    It’s a little easier to do that when you’re young. 😉

    Don’t try to be funny or act funny when you don’t feel like it or it’s not really you. Someone else will do all the funny stuff, talk about funny stuff and you’re destined for something else. Maybe interesting stories since you are a writer. I can say you have a pretty good sense of humor. I think you’re just being a little crazy because you think your life is boring and you don’t have a job. Your life is boring? I say make it fun, do some weird stuff and dare to do things you’ve never done before until you get a job. Just break out of your boring-ness.

    Again, a little easier said than done, and much easier to do when you’re not even drinking age yet. But I do thank you for the encouragement. 🙂

  11. Darc,

    Quit being hard on yourself. A 17 year old writing 7 novels should not concern you–quantity is not quality.

    And as to blogging, you can write what you want, be funny or serious, it does not matter. At the bottom of it, you are a good writer, and people are blind if they can’t see that.

    erm…you must be blind too, because you can’t seem to see it. Get up already and start writing. 🙂

    If it is any good…here’s a virtual huuugg from a friend from KL.

    Ok, now that I’ve gone and acted out of character early in the morning, I’ll go and do some writing of my own.

    Damyanti, you are the jewel of the tropics. Thank you, sweet friend. It means so much to have you say such loving things. Here’s a hug back.

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