I’m a pretty petty person. I get my undies in a knot about a lot of stupid things. One of the things about which I get really stupid-mad is parking spaces.
About 15 years ago, maybe more like 17 actually, I lived in a condo complex with my first wife. We shared a parking lot with a lot of other people and there were simply too many cars. A lot of people had to park away from their houses. For me, I seemed to always get one near the front gate of our house, and I tried not to take the spots in front of someone else’s gate. If I had to park somewhere besides the places right in front of my house, I’d go to the middle of the parking lot and just rage in the car about it. Or seethe and stew and storm past the person in “my” spot in the lot.
One day, I lost it. I lost my temper, my cool and my composure. Oh, and my mind too.
As I walked past that person’s burgundy car, I raked my car key down the side of it good and deep. I peeled back a three or four foot long shaving of the car’s paint, and then it dropped away and a second one took its place. No one saw me – of that I’m sure because I never got a visit from the police – but God saw me. And I saw me. And the guilt in me was, despite knowing this, embarrassingly small.
Like I said, I’m pretty petty.
One of the worst experiences I’ve had since moving into this apartment some five years (almost) ago has been the new neighbors that live upstairs. I’ve complained about them before, you may recall.
One of the positive things I had to say about them in that post was, they didn’t take my parking space. They had the decency, in their subhuman trailer-trashiness, to leave my well-established parking spot to me.
Tonight, that changed.
I’m an immature, irrational P.O.S., too, because I can’t STAND the idea that this group of simians are sitting around somewhere with their car in my f**cking parking spot because I had to go to work and make a living. This isn’t a car I’ve seen before, and I can’t even definitely state it IS their car. I’m just sure of it, in my heart. I can’t live like this though. This is… well, this is just stupid.
So I’m hoping to grow up here sometime and just let it go. It’s been more than a month since they moved in and it’s not happened before. For all I know this is a one-time only situation. We’ll see. And if it’s not their car, well, I guess I’ll have to eat my words and my hat, won’t I?
What about you? Is there a part of you that’s uglier than you like to admit, that makes you as mad at yourself as you are at the thing which triggers it, but feel powerless to stop? Do you have a little pettiness in you which mars your otherwise radiant beauty?
Let me know. It’d be nice not to be alone in this.